Thursday, February 20, 2014

Branching Out In Barkingside

From our local Arts correspondent, Alfred

This is a picture of the tree, in the grounds of the Magistrates Court in Barkingside, which was blown down by the gales last December.

Although it has since been trimmed, in Vision’s continuing policy of covering the area with works of art, there is now a rumour circulating that, because the tree will cost far too much to remove entirely, it will be left where it fell and a local wood carver has been commissioned to carve it into a reclining nude sculpture representing the leader of Vision and the Leader of the Council intertwined.

In doing this it is hoped to silence the critics who have objected to the amount of public money being spent on street art, because the material is already in place and it has been calculated that this green alternative will save the public purse almost £8.35! (It appears, if you look carefully at upper edge of the trunk, that a start has already been attempted.)

It is further believed that when the work is completed later this year, the finished carving will be entitled ‘Putting the Bark Into Barkingside’ and a plaque will be erected appropriately.

It is not yet clear if the base of the tree will be left untouched and similarly entitled ‘Back to Our Roots’.

Negotiations are also rumoured to be taking place for the finished work to be unveiled in a midnight ceremony by the Deputy Prime Minister, The Right Honourable Nick Clegg, dressed in national costume and covered in green polystyrene leaves.

Could be exciting!

Editor: Since submitting the report the tree has gone missing although the root stump remains. It is believed it has been stolen by illegal loggers.


  1. Stop Press- The new Public Art project in Barkingside due to finished and unveiled later this year, has been delayed by 276 days due to a suspected outbreak of Ash die back, both Kenson and Snoozebox have been called in as they both have vast experience of managing delays to Public Projects.

    1. They're both capable of delaying much longer than that before even making a start.

  2. Nice one Alfred - but 40 days too early!

  3. i drive past it quite frequently and being outside of a court I always saw it as a metaphor......

  4. Alfred,i think the idea of a sculpture is a rather good one

  5. Dear Editor,

    I think you will find that the responsibility of that particular tree was down to the Magistrates Court (Home Office) - its a situation a bit like the A12 where TfL are suppose to be in charge of it, get very huffy if someone actually wants to clean it and then relent and ask the Council to do it.

    By the way talking of art work; the 'wayfinder' wigwam at the junction of Tanners Lane was refused planning permission.

    1. Yes we knew it was refused and have put a comment to that effect on the post on that subject.